There once was a princess who’d always wince:I don’t want to marry, I don’t want a prince.I am a woman with goals of my own.I don’t need a man next to me on a throne.So she became queen and has ruled ever since. Laughing Along … Continue reading Dispensable
All alone fair Charlotte stood on the dance floor.
Back in the shadows they called her a cheap “wh…”.
They wanted her out.
But she let out a shout:
“I’m here. I am woman, so now hear me roar!”
Laughing Along with a Limerick: Floor
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Once in the woods a mouse met a fox.
The mouse was a male with long flowing locks.
The fox was also a boy.
And at first they were coy -
Then they thought of their life as a chocolate box.
Laughing Along with a Limerick: Box
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There once was a girl who had a life-long dream.
She wanted to be known as an internet meme
In the world wide web on social media
With a special entry in wikipedia.
No luck! In frustration she could do nothing but scream.
Laughing Along with a Limerick: Scream
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There once was a young man from the Cape
Who worked very hard to stay in shape.
He kept in perpetual motion
Running from ocean to ocean
Ending after 56 k at the finishing tape.
Laughing Along with a Limerick: Cape
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There once was a goat who was fond of her feet.
When she got mucky and dirty she’d loudly bleat.
She hoped for help to get them clean.
The resident fleas were exceptionally keen.
They considered sucking her hooves a particular treat.
Laughing Along with a Limerick: Treat
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There once was a young man from Dundee
Who wanted to get to Glasgow for free.
He stood by the side
of the road. No ride!
He wept even though he showed his bare knee.
Esther want to go Laughing Along with a Limerick: Ride today.
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Two sparrows were frolicking in a footbath
Thinking that it was their own private birdbath.
Along came a peregrine,
A bird of prey, decidedly keen -
Who turned the scene in a bloodbath.
When I was looking for rhymes with bath I came upon “Bundesrath” in a rhyming dictionary. There are two things wrong with that listing. For one, the normal spelling is “Bundesrat”, writing “Rat” like “Rath” is very ancient and predates the German second chamber (aka “Bundesrat”) by something like 150 years. But the th would never be pronounced anyway. So here goes my second limerick:
A journalist reporting from Bath
talked extensively about the Bundesrath.
My teutonic feelings were stirred!
How could he pronounce this word
With a th? That’s clearly the sign of sociopath.
Laughing Along with a Limerick: Bath
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A stuck-up vegetable styled itself as a Brussel sprout,
And claimed to be Belgian - but there was some doubt.
When challenged it shouted: “So you think I’m German?
Tarnation, you turnip, just call me Hermann.
I cannot deny it: YES! I am a Kraut.”
Disclaimer: For my protection I like to emphasise the featured vegetable is not the sprout in question but a bunch of kohlrabi.
Laugh Along with a Limerick: Sprout
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He leaned forward as he was planning to kiss
her. He bent his head, aimed and miss-
ed her. But undeterred
He bent further and erred
again. “Get lost!” she snarled with a hiss.
For Esther’s Laughing Along with a Limerick: Hiss
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